The desire to have children can be so strong that even obstacles such as infertility can’t get in the way. People seeking to expand their families have various options to choose from when deciding how to have their baby. While there is adoption, IVF, and other ways to become a parent, surrogacy is an increasingly popular method. This alternative path to parenthood allows people to find a way of having a baby that suits them. If you’re considering this method, here’s everything you need to know.
The Science of Surrogacy
Surrogacy is a reproductive technique where someone volunteers to carry a baby to full term on behalf of someone else. In traditional surrogacy, the egg of the surrogate is used and the child has their DNA, whereas gestational surrogacy involves the DNA of two separate people. In the latter case, the surrogate doesn’t contribute their DNA but still carries the baby. Gestational surrogacy is less complicated after the child is born since the surrogate has no genetic claim to the infant.
Who is Surrogacy For?
There are many reasons why a person or couple might consider surrogacy over traditional conception. For people with fertility problems, surrogacy allows them to have a baby that shares their DNA. Surrogacy is also useful for intended parents who have medical conditions that would make pregnancy too dangerous either for them or the baby. Same-sex couples also benefit from surrogacy.
Surrogacy and the Law
The law surrounding surrogacy is different depending on your location. It varies across the world and also within countries. In places where surrogacy is embraced, there are structures to provide security and legal support for intended parents and volunteer surrogates. The more regulations there are surrounding surrogacy, the safer it is for everyone involved, including the infant. Experts in reproductive law can offer additional and specific insight if you have more questions about the legality of surrogacy.
Finding a Surrogate
If you’ve decided that having a baby through surrogacy is the best option for you, you’ll have to find someone willing to carry your baby to term. Remember that being pregnant is an extremely taxing and dangerous process for even experienced mothers and surrogates, so finding someone suitable and willing can be a challenge. Trying to find a volunteer surrogate on your own can raise complications and disagreements that become more difficult to untangle when left unaddressed. This is why it’s much more advisable to reach out to a surrogacy agency.
Agencies
People who don’t go through an agency miss out on the added security they can offer. In unfortunate cases, intended parents can find themselves in a difficult spot if their chosen surrogate hasn’t passed any checks or agreed to any formal terms. This is why arrangements such as surrogacy insurance are so necessary for a smooth journey. By going through an agency rather than independently, you decrease the risk of being paired with a surrogate who isn’t medically or psychologically suitable for the important role they’ll play in expanding your family.
Medical Assessments
Unless you plan to use an egg and sperm donor for your baby, you’ll likely need to undergo a few medical assessments prior to conception. Your surrogate will be medically checked to ensure that they’re fit for pregnancy and meet the requirements before their agency will match them with an intended parent, which is another reason not to seek an independent surrogate. If you’re contributing your DNA to the baby, there will be specific medical treatments to evaluate the viability of your cells before conception and implantation. This ensures that the chances of a successful pregnancy are their highest.
Pregnancy and Birth
It can sometimes take more than one attempt before your surrogate becomes pregnant. After twelve weeks, this is usually the point when medical professionals suggest that it’s safe to assume that the pregnancy will be successful. Of course, it’s still essential that the surrogate continues to attend regular checkups to keep an eye on the baby’s development. Before this point, it’s important for intended parents and their surrogate to discuss preferences for the birth plan. A positive relationship with the surrogate makes it easier to negotiate details like being present for the birth.
Costs
It costs money to have a baby through surrogacy since the agency and the surrogate need to be compensated. Intended parents hoping to grow their family using this method must save enough money to cover the costs of a surrogate pregnancy, which usually also include medical expenses and unforeseen costs. Although it may be initially more affordable to seek a surrogate independent of any agency, this leaves the intended parent open to future complications such as custody battles or financial disputes. Agencies help to keep the costs manageable and predictable.
Psychological Complexities
There are so many varied emotions involved in the surrogacy journey. The intended parents will experience the excitement of having a new family member but also trepidation and anxiety. The surrogate may also feel conflicted at different points throughout the pregnancy. Before these problems can become too severe, professional counseling is a great way to curb any potential issues and keep everyone feeling positive.
Parental Rights
The legality of parental rights and surrogacy are different according to location. Check what your local surrogacy and guardianship laws are with a reproductive and family lawyer. Agree your expectations regarding visitation rights and parental claims with your surrogate before the journey begins. In a communicative, healthy scenario, both the intended parents and the surrogate agree completely about how events will unfold after the baby is born.
Becoming a parent through any means is a complex and exciting time. For those interested in surrogacy as a way of having a baby, there are many details worth bearing in mind before making a decision. Knowing the basic science and finding an agency to help match you with a suitable surrogate is so vital to a successful process. Hopefully, the above information has clarified some points for you and helped you to decide your next steps to becoming a parent.